Trichillomania - An Untold Story

Introduction

Hello reader, I hope you are fine and enjoying lockdown and utilising your time in Studies,work and many more.
Today, I am going to write a real incident that I had faced previous year on set of Lockdown. Those who have friends,Girlfriends or boyfriends and office friends didn't face the trauma of lockdown that I had faced.

What was the problem which I had faced?

It was Trichillomania, - A hair picking Syndrome or you can a type of Disorder. In this syndrome, patients starts pulling their own head hair to get pleasure from Depression or anxiety.

What was the main cause for me in my Case?

Its main cause in my case basically due to my increasing loneliness, depression, stress, anxiety and sadness or just feelling like that someone closed me in a prison.

How it has Started & Ended?

After my exams, I was thinking to go on holidays just for enjoying. I was thinking to take a minor break from my studies coz; I had never get a chance to go on vacations from 1st standard. I spent more than 10 years of life in a 10 by 10 foot room with my books and bags with my Beautiful teddy bear. That time i was in too much stress and depression. I have no friends circle and whatever cirle i don't know. I don't have any contact from my any classmate. Only I had only Sir Rakesh , I generally used to talk to them to supress my depression. After 10th Day of Indian Lockdown, I saw an ad of BYJU's. So I think to join that classes to supress my Depression. Also I am user of byjus since sept.2018.
During Depression I don't know what i am doing with my Brown hairs. I started pulling my own hair because I feel very nice and relax also get more pleasure from Depression.
That time even I don't know how to use Whatsapp and how to put status. There had been patches developed on my head where I used to pull my hair.

Patches something like these

Then I search on Internet a lot, After 1 month It was confirmed that I am suffering from trichillomania - a syndrome or say disorder.
I have to shave off my hair during lockdown to feel relax more than 3 times in the interval of just 4 months. It's a real story of mine.
It has been reduced when my board results been declared for only 3-4 days. I was living in stress and I don't know what's was the cause of that stress. I think the main reason was my loneliness. Its sounds pretty intuitative but it's true.

How September 2020 proved Lucky for me?

Finally in September, after 5th september, i remember it starts reducing but there was Patches on my forehead from August month. September 2020 was lucky month because my sister contacted me. Finally my active Chats on whatsapp increased from 2 to 3. But before my Birthday and CBSE NOCs, I again had to shave off my head. I was looking weird on my birthday. I have to submit my recent photograph to my classteacher, in that picture I was looking so weired.

Finally in October, I again started Blogger and wrote my first poem Take Me To Heaven. Nothing special happened to me in October.
Now November- A month of devil came. After Diwali and chath puja . A very weired, dangerous and Devil period is going to start, I was both aware and unaware from what is coming to me. On 26th November, I suffered from a lot of unbearable Pain in my Abdomen. That day, I cried a lot from inside my pillows got drenched in my tears. I was trying to hide my pain from my parents but when my capacity broke down. I call my parents to take care of me. I got Goosebumps while writing and remembering that horrible incident. I had to take one injection to supress my pain. Doctor advised me to take some medicines but I refused, that time I was not feeling well to annoy that doctor.
Generally, I never intake any tablets inside my tummy completely, my body discards any tablets or medicines in form of vomit and others except for injections.

In last weeks ofApril 2021, My pain disappeared.But that incident again triggered my trichillomania , again same patches developed and again in January I shaved off my head beacuse my online classes were going to start.

Thanks to teachers, and my sisters, they don't know that they were helping me. I never told anything about this.
In physics and computer labs I enjoyed a lot with Rupesh Sir, Manu sir and other teachers. Thanks to all keeping my Happy during my bad times.

How am I today?

Now, I am fine, Good and writing this blog for you and listening "Ki Kore Bolbo Tomay | Raaz Ankhenin Teri" - A bengali Song composed by Sheetal Mohanty ji.
Those Who are Suffering from trichillomania, I wanted to tell one thing that Try to keep yourself Happy if you don't have any siblings with others peoples like teachers or friends(if any). You can also use meditation to supress or listen pleasant songs. These days I am meditating becoz, I feels very well in first 2 days. Meditation really helps a lot. Think positively and try to find something positive in negative. You can also use teddy bear in night times to reduce loneliness no matter you are boy or a girl, i know you are a human like me. I wants to live freely and help peoples.
Once Again, Thank You To all those who helped me a lot like an angel.

Thank You for Reading my Blog.